Last night I got the answer from the student exchange program I wanted, of course I was excited. After seeing the results, it's a shame I wasn't accepted. Of course sad feelings arise, disappointed, confused. After I felt that, in my head immediately appeared what next steps should I take. I have to make a new plan because this one failed.

Immediately there were other activities that I had to do besides joining this student exchange but were not accepted, namely focusing on my dance competition which will be held next month because this time I don't want to fail again. then my project at school, I have to complete it to completion and until I feel satisfied. I also have to focus on returning to school because previously my focus was diverted.

After so many plans popped into my head, I knew I had to tell my parents, because they were praying for me. At first I was hesitant to tell them, but finally I was able to tell them even though I was crying because I was sad. My mother than said, "Gak apa-apa, berarti itu bukan yang terbaik buat Thania, Allah pasti punya rencana yang lebih baik lagi untuk Thania. Sedih gak apa-apa, tapi kamu jangan malah nyalahin diri kamu sendiri. Ibu tahu Thania udah berusaha maksimal, udah berdoa terus-terusan, dan udah berani, keren. Tapi inget, student exchange ini berarti bukan yang terbaik untuk Thania, pasti kedepannya akan ada hal yang lebih baik lagi yang akan datang. Ibu percaya kok kalau Thania pasti akan lebih sukses lagi selain ikut student exchange.". mother tried to calm me down, and comforting me because I blamed myself if maybe I didn't pray enough, or I didn't deserve to join this student exchange.

then I said that I was embarrassed to people who knew that I was going to study exchange, I was confused about what to say, but my mother said "Ya bilang aja gak keterima, biarin kamu nanti di ceng-cengin, di omongin yang enggak-enggak, toh mereka gak tahu prosesnya kayak gimana, dan kamu juga jadi gak nyesel kan kalau udah pernah nyoba.". Then I also thought, yes, if I do not regret it, if I have already tried it, how does it feel to try applying to the student exchange program.